This Boy Will Self Destruct in 10 Seconds....

Been on a self-destructive course for most of the week. The timetable sucked and things were planned wrongly and there was often no one there to teach when we turn up, or they did not know that they were supposed to be teaching us. Combined with that, there was also some personal stuff that was running me down. I did the only thing that I am used to doing when I am really stressed. I avoid it with other distractions that I can seriously concentrate on. I hit the computer game and the storybooks.

I ended up in bed almost every night for the past few nights at about 3 or 4 in the morning when I could no longer stay awake. Woke up at 7 am even before the alarm rings and I would have to try to toss and turn until I am able to catch the extra 15 mins or so until the alarm goes ring ring.

In school, I am just walking about in a daze, not really knowing what is happening and not really giving much to it as no one seems to care about us as well. We get that oh… you are the PhD students, and then ppl just give us that look. At first it was really cool, but the way some of them says it, it almost seem a little sarcastic. All I wanted to do each day was to rush hone as soon as possible.

Once I get home, all I want to do is to go back to bed, which I would usually manage about an hour or so before I get up on my own again and then I would surf blogs for a bit before I hit the games. When I am tried of the games, I would settle on the bed and then turn on the bedside lamp to read my storybooks.

Totally self-destructive, but I guess everyone hits ruts like this now and then.